Your own big wedding day was meant to be that one special day where the whole world revolves around you and only you. Well, that’s what we grow up believing at any rate. We imagine the entire Cinderella ball with that elegant dream wedding dress and Prince Charming.
Regretably, usually what occurs is the bride allows too many cooks in the kitchen, then suddenly it has become somebody else’s dream come true. Which means your wedding day dream is spoiled.
Just remember, it is really not your fault. Wedding Planning, no matter if you have the assistance of a professional wedding planner or not, is a very daunting task. Not only do you have to think about yourself, but there’s guests, the wedding party, all the vendors, assorted expenses, and a whole slew of other odds and ends that pertain to your wedding day.
Realize that you are going to need help. One bride can not possibly do it all by herself plus keep her sanity. Beware though, as occasionally your help will try to cross the line and just about intimidate you into doing what they want for your wedding. And this is not always necessarily what you really want for your wedding day.
It could be the overbearing wedding planner trying to talk you out of everything you have had planned for the last 20 years, or since as long as you can remember. Perhaps it’s your dear ole mom, shaking her head in disapproval or frowning on your choices when you pick out that trendy colorful wedding dress instead of choosing a more traditional white one to wear on your wedding day as you walk down the aisle.
It can really zap all of the enjoyment out of planning your wedding day when those around you don’t agree with your plans. The key is being able to learn how to bolster yourself and not get worked up, against the multitude of varying opinions that will be bombarding you to do things you don’t want to do.
While working with a professional wedding planner, if you end up with one who isn’t allowing you to express your creative ideas, you really should just think about finding a different one. If you dread that thought, try having a heart to heart discussion and let her know warmly, yet firmly, that you are appreciative of the expertise she brings to the table, however you also know exactly what you want on your wedding day and you just need her assistance in carrying it out. This tactic usually works, and since they won’t want to lose you as a client, state your wishes directly and specifically to her and she should step right in line with your wants.
Unfortunately, what often occurs though, is that it is a friend or family member who becomes the overbearing element in the wedding day planning. Having the thought of putting them in their place is just awful. You start worrying that their feelings will get hurt or possibly that an argument may follow. And yet this is suppose to be the happiest time of your life!
So what to do? Here is how to deal with overbearing family members. Just say, Mom, let’s talk for a minute. You know I respect and value your opinions more than anybody or anything in the entire world. However, ever since I was a small child, I have had these ideas floating around in my head of just how exciting it would be to plan my very own wedding day. Now I realize that you are probably going to spot all of the mistakes I am making, and I know it will be frustrating for you when I choose to go my own direction, but I really appreciate all of your love and support. I would just like to have fun doing all of the planning with you, without arguing over the details.
After this, Mom should get the hint that she is putting a damper on your wedding plans. If she doesn’t, just give her a friendly smile, kiss her on her cheek and say, please don’t be mad when we do this my way. Then just go on about your business preparing everything for the wedding day the way you want to do it. Should she continue butting in during the planning process, remember, just smile at her and say, I appreciate the advice you are giving me, however, I am going to use my idea.
Keep in the back of your mind that some people just like to argue. Should you run into somebody who will not let it go, and simply wants to ruin what you have in mind for your wedding day, you need to try staying away from that person as much as you can while you fulfill your dream wedding. Yes, it will be heart wrenching, but the thing to know is that this is your wedding day, and not theirs. Always treat yourself right and enjoy picking out that green wedding dress or purple wedding bouquet!
